By Henry Ukazu
It is a well-established fact that in life, there’s time for everything. A time to sow, and a time to reap; a time to cry and a time to be joyful; a time to be born and a time to die; and a time to succeed and a time to fail. The list is literally endless. Amongst all these, the gateway of overcoming this challenge is having a positive mindset. When you diffuse your mind from negative thoughts, you give yourself the positive energy to live again.
In the journey of life, sometimes we are too complacent. We sometimes hold onto sentimental attachment with our fellow human beings due to vested interest. Most of us kind of play along or flow when it comes to who we surround ourselves with.
Having a positive mindset is priceless. A positive mindset tells you that despite all the bullets that is thrown at you, it shall fade away if it’s definitely not for you. A positive energy tells you that regardless of what is said about you, they don’t decide your fate. A positive mindset tells you that when they go low, you go high. A positive attitude empowers you to raise the price so that detractors will find it hard to rent a space from your mind.
You cannot underestimate the power of positive mindset. However, before you are able to appreciate the strength of positivity in your life, you must keep negative people out of your life. The question now becomes, how do I kick off negativity from my life? Kicking out negativity does not only involve distancing yourself from friends and associations, it also entails distancing yourself from negative thoughts. This is because that is where all negative thoughts arise.
Just like how success and failure arise first from the mind, distancing yourself from the world starts from the mind as well. You’ll have to conceive the idea first before acting on it. It should be noted that if you don’t weed out negative thoughts and people from your mind, they’ll hunt you. Let’s take a case study of a farmer who plants a crop. He has to constantly weed the farm in order to allow the crop grow and mature very well before he/she can harvest. In the same way, we need to separate our self from the chaff.
As human beings, we all have one form of chaff living in us. It’s up to us to weed out all the chaff in our life. This chaff can be friends, family, insecurity, associations, habits or even blind spots which you are not aware of. It’s high time you shook off any chaff of disappointments preventing you from possessing your passion. You are in charge of your life. Has it ever occurred to you that you are the landlord of your life? If yes, then it’s imperative for you to raise the bar so that cheap people can’t rent a spot in your mind. Don’t allow people with no value to occupy a space in your brain which you can use to create ideas and solutions.
As human beings, sometimes, we always think human beings are the cause of our failures, but in reality, the reason is simply because we are still hanging out with negativity, free yourself by separating yourself from the crowd.
How to distance yourself from negativity
There are several ways to distance yourself from negativity: Avoid negative people because they literally have no value except envy and doubt. Set boundaries from strangers and people you are not comfortable with in order to keep your sanity of mind. Look out for solutions and not problems; and finally, don’t take things personally and always practice self-love.
When you distance yourself from negative people, your thoughts become positive. When you’re surrounded by other people’s negativity, you may find it harder to regulate your own positive and negative reactions and emotions. When you are surrounded by negativity, it will be hard to find reasons to feel happy or positive. However, once you distance yourself from negativity, your positive emotions will start to show themselves again.
According to a Life coach and author, Tandee A. Victor, “Complaining can completely ruin your life by taking all the happiness out of it. When you constantly complain, you develop a negative mentality about everything. That leads to discontent and inner turmoil.” This is simply what negative thought brings to the mind. It’s easier to think, feel and stay positive when you’re surrounded by such happy, good and positive energy. You’ll be surrounded by good people and good things, rather than an endless feedback loop of negative energy.
Sometimes, a lot of people don’t notice that they’re surrounded by negativity until they start to distance themselves from it. Therefore, in order to separate or distance yourself, you must detach yourself from the crowd. And finally, ask yourself why? Ask yourself why now? Ask yourself how? Ask yourself when? You can do this by finding the root cause and start looking at how it affects you, the people around you. Look around you, look at yourself. Food for thought: The one thing that happens immediately after distancing yourself from negativity in life is a shift in the way that you’re thinking.
Release
You can distance yourself from the crowd by releasing yourself and your mind from any distraction. You need to let it out whatever has been disturbing you in your life. It would greatly help if you release feelings. The longer you keep it in, the harder it will get.
Forgive
Pride can make you do things you’ll regret. Pride will make you say words that can leave wounds deeper than any blade can ever do. Forgive them and forgive yourself. This will help you have peace of mind. And wouldn’t it be calming to think that nothing else is holding you back from moving on, from detaching yourself from the things that aren’t good for you. Forgive.
Be grateful
Be grateful for the pain and sorrow. Be grateful for the joy and hope. Be grateful for the memories. Be grateful for the smiles and scars, and the wounds and tears. Be grateful for realizing the reason you’re detaching. There are so much other things, and many other people that you can be grateful for in your life.
Amazing things happen when you distance yourself from negativity in this life.
The simple question I have for you today is what’s your own chaff?
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success and President of gloemi.com. He can be reached via henrous@gmail.com